New parents today only want what is best for their children. As the child grows old, parents begin to develop their own style of parenting. Almost all those children brought into this world get to experience what it is to have a loving family but for a small percentage, life is not so easy.
While every parent’s intentions are the same, the parenting style they develop can have a good impact on their child. Parents with more controlling style often raise children with less confidence in themselves a fear to express whereas parents with more relaxing style allow the child to regulate themselves as much as possible and if expectations are met, punishments rarely follow. Also, the little rules and regulations are thoroughly explained and discussed with the child. Punishments do exist in this style but rather than making the child fear them they are given punishments to ‘remember and learn’.
‘Tiger Mom’ is a new word to describe how a mother disciplines her children with tough rules. In 2011, Miss. Amy L. Chua’s book, “Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother” Created the word “Tiger Mom” (They never allowed the children to watch TV or play a computer game or get a result lower than grade A. They must play violin and piano; other instruments are not allowed). Nowadays there are many distractions to children that could possibly distract them from studying. Tiger moms forcing her child to study, or practice different skills could keep them on track. While Tiger mom methods are criticized as extreme, the results show that it works.
Motivation is understood to come from within an individual in Western families, while Asian children find strength in parental expectations. The pressure doesn’t strain their relationships with their mothers. Following the failure, Asian students compared with Western counterparts are more motivated by their mothers or the feeling that mom is on their side in challenging times. They bounced back quicker than Westerners. High-pressure mother often works alongside them.
When it comes to motivating, child merit can be found in both the approaches.
Even if Asian and Western parenting styles differ radically, they represent two paths to the same destination. But Tiger parenting falters in at least two ways. First, it promotes conformity over creativity. The use of authoritarian parenting can lead children to do as they are told even if there was a better way of doing. Critics say they become like a robot. It is the ideal life of their parents, not their children. It may lead to psychological damage to the kids. Self-esteem of the kids is compromised. Although this style leads to success in some respects, all-round development and a nice memorable childhood will be deprived.
The important part of education is helping the child in becoming better at what he/she is good at. In order to provide the world with smart and skilled people, the educational system should develop a child’s natural talent and interest. This is also applicable when talking about the upbringing of a child. But a lot of upbringing of a child depends on the cultural background. Different cultures have different ways of raising children. However, the parent should acknowledge that we live in a globalized world and thus prepare the child with an open mind.
First Published at Creative Moms Hub